Fate Bound (Fate Bound Trilogy Book 1) Read online

  Her words sound impossible, but I know in my heart—in my soul—that they’re true. The golden eyes, the shifting form—those memories aren’t hallucinations. What I saw was real, and somehow I’ve become the same thing.

  Lillie raises her eyebrows as she studies me. “Wow, you’re taking this much better than most people do.” She lets out a soft laugh. “Jack still teases me about how long it took me to believe. I was convinced someone had slipped me LSD when they first told me. Then again, it was the sixties, so it wasn’t that ridiculous an assumption.”

  A thrill courses through me. My skin tingles in a way that’s completely unfamiliar—but I like it. “Who’s Jack?”

  An understanding smile stretches across Lillie’s lips. “He’s our pack leader—our alpha male. He’s also the one who brought you here.”

  I mull over this information. I remember clearly the look in his eyes before they turned yellow—an unspeakable sadness paired with unimaginable anger. I’m not sure why my wounded body would elicit such a visceral reaction. I’m also not sure why hearing his name would make the cells of my body hum. Is it because he brought me here? Or is it because of how I remember him—human him—before he shifted? I had wished then I’d met him under different circumstances, met him before I was dying. But now that I have a second chance, maybe I’ll have the opportunity to know him. “I’d like to meet him.”

  Lillie nods. “And I know he wants to see you. The rest of the pack is anxious to meet you too. Come on.” She pushes back the curtain that separates the bed from the rest of the room to reveal a doorway and stairs leading upward. We’re in the basement. It strikes me then that I’ve been in a house this whole time. I’m not cloistered in some cheerily painted room in an office building; I’m in someone’s home.

  The ground floor is spacious but modestly decorated. Fresh wildflowers add bursts of color in the centers of an oval dining room table and a low wooden coffee table. “This is my place, in case you were wondering,” Lillie says as she leads us toward the front door. “There are four rooms, and I have three roommates.” She bites her lower lip as she glances over her shoulder, as if weighing whether or not to continue. “I wish I had an extra room—then you could stay with me. I mean, there’s the basement of course, but it’s not exactly suitable for living in. Besides, Jack wants that bed open all the time for people in transition or in case someone gets badly injured.” Her face tightens like she regrets having brought it up. “I don’t want you to think that I don’t like all my roommates or anything, because that’s not the case. It’s just one of them is a little messy and I’m always cleaning up after her.” She holds open the door and we step out into the bright afternoon. The June sun sparkles more brightly than ever. I wonder if it’s because I’ve been inside so long, or if something about being a werewolf is making my sight sharper, the same way my sense of smell is enhanced.

  Lillie leads me up a grassy embankment. I scan the vicinity. There are dozens of cabins situated at intervals among the trees and rolling hills of whatever property we’re on. “Jack will give you a house to live in, of course,” Lillie continues. “I wonder if you’ll have an empty room in your place,” she murmurs, more to herself than me. “Maybe I can convince Jack to let me move in with you.”

  I suppose it makes sense that Jack, the guy who brought me here and the leader of this pack, would provide me with a place to live, but the way Lillie speaks of her own living arrangements jars me. “Wait—convince him? What does he think he is, the boss of you? If there’s an empty room where I’m at, why not just come and stay there?”

  Lillie’s mouth twitches and her eyebrows scrunch. “He’s not my boss—not exactly. But he is my leader. He always makes decisions for the good of the group. He takes care of us—all of us.”

  “It doesn’t sound like he cares much at all if he’s making you share a house with someone you don’t like.”

  Lillie holds up her hands. “I didn’t say I don’t like her,” she says quickly. “I just don’t like living with her. Besides, you can’t blame Jack—I’ve never told him. It seems a silly reason to want to move, and I don’t want to hurt my roommate’s feelings.”

  I understand where she’s coming from. I was in a similar situation once in a foster home I lived in for half a year. The girl I shared a room with talked in her sleep, and it woke me up almost every night. I’m sure if I’d mentioned it to my foster parents, they would have shifted things around, but my roommate was the kind of girl who felt abandoned by everyone—and I knew that feeling all too well. I hadn’t wanted to abandon her too, so I caught catnaps when I could throughout the day and dealt with the inconvenience of not being able to sleep through the night. Maybe Lillie and I aren’t so different.

  As we continue up a large hill with a long building situated at its apex, I’m reminded of the time a foster family sent me to summer camp, thinking the experience would be good for me. This place is a lot like that, except the cabins look more like homes. They’re larger and made of rough-hewn timbers instead of cinder blocks. Some of the houses even have gardens of bright flowers out front. It’s clear the people staying in them aren’t simply passing through.

  “So, does the whole pack live here?” I ask.

  “Yes. There are sixty-five of us—sixty-six now that you’re joining us.” She raises her chin toward the building we’re approaching. “That’s the meeting house. It’s always open, and we use it pretty frequently—almost any time the whole pack gets together. Jack likes to make announcements there, and it’s usually our home base for pack-wide parties.”

  When we crest the hill, I notice Jack immediately. He stands at the end of a long, covered porch, and he smiles when his gaze rests on me. His dark hair is somewhat less wild than it was the last time I saw him, like he’s done his best to tame its unruly nature. The curls at the nape of his neck are the only evidence of the waves I saw the other night. His gray V-neck tee stretches across his chest and shoulders in a way that leaves nothing about his musculature to the imagination. My fingers stretch with the desire to skate across those muscles.

  Heat creeps into my cheeks, and I fight the urge to hide my face behind my hands. I don’t think any guy has ever had this strong an impact on me. I do my best to keep my breathing even as I approach him.

  He holds out his hand. “I’m Jack.”

  After a moment’s hesitation, I settle my palm against his, inhaling sharply when an electric jolt speeds up my arm at the contact. “I’m Ava,” I say, immediately feeling silly. Does he already know that? How could he?

  He holds my hand for a beat longer than strictly necessary before releasing it. “I’m really glad to see how quickly you recovered. For a while there, I wasn’t sure you’d survive at all. I’m not sure how much you remember, but you were badly injured. I’ve never seen anyone complete the transition who was as close to death as you were.” His gunmetal-blue eyes lock on mine, and I feel as if he’s staring directly into my soul. “Your heart stopped. I thought I lost you.”

  My heart flutters in my chest, and I wish Jack hadn’t already released my hand. I try to shake the feeling off. It’s just gratitude—it has to be. “Thank you for saving me.”

  Jack blinks, and the spell is broken. “I didn’t.”

  His words make the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. Questions chase themselves around my mind. If he didn’t intervene, how am I alive? I assumed he was somehow responsible for me being a werewolf, but what if he’s not? How am I what I am now?

  Before I can land on one query to pose, he nods toward the building behind him. “I’d like to introduce you to the pack. They’re all excited to meet you.”

  I don’t know if I’m ready for that—not with my mind spinning with uncertainty. But if Jack is the leader of the pack, do I really have a right to demand anything from him right now? I’m sure there will be time for questions later.

  I glance at Lillie, who nods encouragingly. “I guess I’m excited to meet them too.”

&nbs
p; Jack nods. “That’s good. Now listen: I want you to follow your instincts when you’re talking with your new family. We need to learn where you’re going to fit in with the pack. This will help.”

  “Okay,” I say, injecting a measure of confidence into my voice that I don’t feel. Heavy dread settles in the pit of my stomach, the way it always did whenever I met a new foster family. I was forever trying to figure out where I was supposed to fit in. At least I have practice.

  “Wait here for a minute. I’m going to go get their attention.” Jack pivots and strides to the nearest set of doors, and it’s only with great effort that I tear my gaze from his retreating form.

  “Don’t be nervous,” Lillie says, but her voice holds a note of apprehension. “Just remember, you have two sides now—your human side and your wolf side. We all do. Your human side is reasonable. It can compartmentalize feelings and disagreements. Wolves can’t do that. Wolves need to know who’s strongest, whose lead they can trust on the hunt or in a fight. Jack and our alpha female are both strong, smart fighters, but they’re also compassionate and willing to do anything for the others in the pack. Their brains are tactical. They can see the whole picture. That’s part of why they’re alphas. We know we can trust them with our lives because they’ll do anything to protect ours. Some of our wolves are nurturers and shy away from fights. Some are hotheaded and will run into battle without an exit strategy. We need to figure out what kind of wolf you are.”

  I chew on my lower lip. I’ve barely got a handle on what kind of human I am—how am I supposed to figure out what kind of wolf is inside me? But before I can ask, Jack opens the door and pokes his head out.

  “Ava, we’re ready for you.”

  After another encouraging nod from Lillie, I walk into the building. Everyone’s eyes are on me as I enter, and my defenses go up immediately. Instinctively, I scan the room and take note of where the exits are, just in case I need to get away.

  But escape is unnecessary. Some of the girls closest to me step forward and offer their hands. They smile in a way that puts me at ease, and I can’t help wondering if their wolves are the nurturers Lillie spoke of.

  While I get the sense everyone wants the chance to talk with me, no one presses in too quickly and I’m not overwhelmed. Lillie stays a few steps behind; I wonder if it’s on Jack’s order or if she simply wants to make sure I’m all right.

  They ask a lot of questions, but no one seems upset when my answers aren’t incredibly detailed. I’m still not sure how much information I want to give away to these strangers, even if they are supposed to be my new family. I’ve been in that situation too many times to be confident this stop is permanent.

  A girl who introduces herself as Maggie asks if I have any family who might be worried about me. She gives my hand a squeeze when I tell her no, but she doesn’t press further.

  A tall, pale, strawberry blonde named Fiona and a girl with dark hair and deep brown eyes named Marisol offer to give me a tour of the grounds after I settle in. They tell me they were friends even before they were turned—that Sawyer found them after a bad car crash and saved them.

  “It’s the best thing that ever happened to me,” Marisol says with a shy smile.

  I lose track of time as the conversations shift from being all about me to being about some of the people I’m meeting. A few pack members recount their own stories of being turned or of their first day with the pack. Others tell me how much I’ll love being a wolf, how incredible it will feel the first time I shift and run through the woods.

  I’m chatting with a girl named Dakota—a tall woman with long, sleek black hair and an olive complexion—when Jack calls for everyone’s attention and tells us to go outside. He locks eyes with me, and while he says nothing, I know he wants me to stay put until he reaches me. I wonder if it’s an alpha thing—a few of the wolves I met mentioned how the alphas can give commands that pack members have no choice but to obey.

  By the time Jack and I make it outside, everyone is standing in a large circle on the grassy slope behind the meeting house. Four girls, Lillie included, step into the center of the clearing and the familiar weight of dread sinks in my stomach.

  I look at Jack. “What’s going on?”

  He meets my eye and I shiver even before he speaks. “You have to choose one of them to fight.”

  Chapter Four

  “Choose wisely,” Jack continues. “Be sure whoever you pick is someone you can beat. If you lose, you’ll be cast out—a lone wolf.”

  My jaw drops and I stare at him. Is he serious? I just spent the last hour getting to know these people. I was told they would be my new family. But now if I don’t win a fight, I’ll be kicked out? This is insane. Even if I go through with this, is this really the kind of life I want to be part of?

  Lillie told me Jack cares for the wolves here. Is this what she meant? I’ve lived with a lot of families since my dad died, and the only one that came close to being this messed up was when I was still with my aunt Erica and her crazy, drunk boyfriend. I left that situation, and part of me wants to leave this one too.

  What if I choose not to fight at all? I imagine the consequence would be the same as losing—I’d be kicked out and have to live as a lone wolf. I’ve felt alone most of my life, but I can’t help fearing what it might mean to be alone as a werewolf. I have no idea what this life will be like. What if I go off on my own and can’t control myself? What if I hurt someone? No, I can’t do that.

  If this is the way the pack is run, I’ll go with it—for now. I can always leave later if I need to.

  I take in a breath and draw my shoulders back before stepping toward the line of girls facing me. I spoke with them all in the meeting house. The one on the left—Maggie, a petite brunette—is clearly submissive. I’m pretty sure I could beat her easily, but I don’t want to. It would feel wrong to fight her. There’s Lillie, but I don’t want to go up against her, either. I like her. She’s been nothing but kind to me.

  That narrows my choice to two. I rack my brain for their names and it takes a moment before I remember them. The tall one with wavy blonde hair is Skye. We spoke only briefly, and I don’t know anything about her, but I get the sense she could beat me with one hand tied behind her back. That leaves the other girl. Her name is Mel. Her thick brown hair is pulled back into a ponytail, accentuating the angles of her face. She reminds me of a girl I knew in foster care who bossed all the smaller kids around. I’d wanted to fight that girl then to make her stop being so mean, but I couldn’t.

  I hold on to all that bottled-up anger and call it forth as I bring up my hand to point at her. “I choose Mel.”

  Whispers buzz around the circle as Lillie, Maggie, and Skye rejoin the others. I do my best to ignore the sounds as I move into the center of the clearing.

  Mel’s russet eyes lock on me and she strikes a fighting pose, with one forearm in front of her and the other drawn back, prepared to attack. I try to imitate her, but I feel more than a little ridiculous. I took one six-week self-defense class in middle school. My dad insisted I master some basic skills before he’d let me walk by myself to school. I do my best to recall everything I learned, but the focus was obviously on defense, not offense. I’ve never started a fight in my life. I don’t want to make the wrong first move and have this be over before it’s begun.

  The pack is agitated. I do my best to ignore it, but I see movement in my periphery.

  “Make a move!” calls a guy.

  “Do something already!” yells a girl.

  Others join in, but I’m not ready yet. If I make the wrong move, Mel will take me out. I have to wait for the right moment.

  “Come on, Mel! Get this over with!”

  Out the corner of my eye, I notice as Jack nods. In a flash, Mel lunges at me. She’s so fast I don’t have time to react, and she strikes me on the jaw. I stumble backward but manage to stay on my feet. When she rushes at me again, I swing my fist, but only achieve a glancing blow. Mel strikes me in the
stomach and I double over. She comes at me, but I manage to move backward before she can land a kick.

  I put a few feet between the two of us. I need the space to give me time to react before she makes her next move. Mel grins, but it’s not a friendly look. She’s enjoying this. I wonder if she likes the idea of me being cast out.

  She comes at me again, but I anticipate her moves this time. She’s going for my jaw again, and at the last second, I duck out of the way and grab her wrist. This is one technique I remember from my classes. I twist her hand in a way that makes it impossible for her not to follow my lead. She thrashes, but before she can get away, Jack steps forward and lifts his hands.

  “The fight is over.”

  Mel struggles for a split second longer before going rigid. Once I’m sure she’s not going to come at me again, I release my grip and face Jack.

  A smile spreads across his face as he approaches. He holds a hand out to me and I walk to his side, understanding that’s what he wants me to do. I scan the faces of the other pack members surrounding us and see expressions of surprise mingled with either delight or concern.

  Jack reaches for my hand and laces his fingers with mine. I’m too surprised to react, and he’s talking before I can say anything. “Since Ava’s arrival, I know you have all wondered where her place in the pack will be. Now that question is answered. Although new to our life and our ways, she’s proven her resilience and the ability to think on her feet. By refusing to choose an easy fight, she’s proven her first instinct is to care for those who need it.” He squeezes my fingers and beams at me before continuing. “I’m pleased to present our new beta female. We thank Mel for her time in that position, and we will respect her in her new rank as she will respect Ava in hers.”